Hi Everyone! :)
As i'm struggling a lot nowadays bad memories from my childhood showed up. *sighs*
THE REST OF THE STORIES MIGHT BE TRIGGERING!!!! :
So when i was younger ( about 12-13 years old ) my father told me that i'm fat. He always commented about my weight. He made fun of me. I'd love to eat. And i ate a lot. I was happy, cheerful and talkative. He usually said that i should loose weight. One day when we were at my father's wife's parents' house he said that everytime we are here i'm eat like a little pig . ( I eat that much ). Words hurts.
Later ( about 3 or 4 years later ) we were on a holiday. I didn't like to wear bikini but i did for my father. So we were lying at the beach and suddenly he turned to me and said that i should loose 10 kilogramms and if i would, i wouldn't be thin. I would be " okay". It hurted me so much.
So know almost EVERYTIME i about to eat, or just thinking about eating i feel guilty and i hear the words that my father said ages ago: " Your eating like a pig. Everytime." " You should loose 10 kgs and i if you do you won't be thing. You just be "okay . ".
Trying not to think about it :)
As i'm struggling a lot nowadays bad memories from my childhood showed up. *sighs*
THE REST OF THE STORIES MIGHT BE TRIGGERING!!!! :
So when i was younger ( about 12-13 years old ) my father told me that i'm fat. He always commented about my weight. He made fun of me. I'd love to eat. And i ate a lot. I was happy, cheerful and talkative. He usually said that i should loose weight. One day when we were at my father's wife's parents' house he said that everytime we are here i'm eat like a little pig . ( I eat that much ). Words hurts.
Later ( about 3 or 4 years later ) we were on a holiday. I didn't like to wear bikini but i did for my father. So we were lying at the beach and suddenly he turned to me and said that i should loose 10 kilogramms and if i would, i wouldn't be thin. I would be " okay". It hurted me so much.
So know almost EVERYTIME i about to eat, or just thinking about eating i feel guilty and i hear the words that my father said ages ago: " Your eating like a pig. Everytime." " You should loose 10 kgs and i if you do you won't be thing. You just be "okay . ".
Trying not to think about it :)
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